Friday, 16 October 2009

Date 4 - Mr Chookter


Right so this time I have to have got it right. Five foot 11, nice teeth, pics look great, profile good. He emails, I email back. Few emails later then he asks for my mobile number "not to call me?" I say in alarm! "No just to text" Fine I can agree with that. So the texts start. Initially odd one during the day and then some in the evening thats fine. The one thing I have learned during this experience is that men seem to have an expectation that you will text back immediately! That leads me to another dating question - what is an acceptable time to leave before texting back? How many texts are acceptable? For me normally I would text people back straight away but I currently have a baby to run around after - texting back is NOT my priority! However I have learned when you enter the world of dating this not texting back within say 10 mins means you are all of a sudden not interested. I have to say I am getting slightly annoyed with men who then text back 15 mins later with the "oh if you don't like me just say" christ if a woman was to text that to a man they would be running for the hills but for us we just have to accept that the 10 min rule applies with men! Great another bloody con to add to the relationship list.....

So I keep up the texting as much as I can (again why should I but at least I need to prove I made the effort!) Guys you really are complex charachters I tell ya!

We arrange to meet on the Sunday evening for a coffee first with the agreement that we will start with coffee and see how it goes (ie stay out for something to eat.) Venue - livingroom (again I hear you moan but I just love it there- feel very secure in there for some bizarre reason)
Time - 5.30

So no need to dig out the nightmare side zipping dresses this is a jeans a top assignment.

Get on the bus at 5 (yes I do do buses especially at that time of day). Head into town and all going well so far. He texts to say that he is on route. He lives down in the Borders somewhere so its a fair hike for him. 10 mins later he texts back to say thats me in George Street now. So there I am standing outside the Livingroom waiting on this man to appear who all I know is the small teeny pic I have seen of him. A couple of people pass and the nerves start building up but the keep on walking.. Its amazing how at my age you are still standing there feeling totally frozen to the spot when some guy on his own walks past!

Then walking towards me I see a really nice looking guy with lovely three quarter length coat on = he looks lush. Get a wee bit excited. He's walking right towards me and is slowing down - cool this could be the start of a good night. He stops right where I am but then talks to the person behind me - gutted!

10 mins later I am still standing there and starting to feel a bit like a spare - I hate lateness almost as much as bad teeth! Then on the other side of the road a guy walking along, only this time unlike Mr Long Coat mentioned above my heart actually sinks into the floor. Please do not let this man cross the road as I will just die if it is him. He looked horrendous! Phew he kept on walking. Thank God. Still no sign of this man though and he should be here by now as when he called earlier he was only a 5 min walk away! Just getting ready to fish my phone out of my bag when someone taps me on the shoulder saying "hey Sam" I turn and to my shock its the bloody man I saw on the other side of the street! noooooooooooooooooooooooo Fuck what do you do? Can't bail now! Could I just pretend I have had a heartattack? no I can't. Too polite to do that... So I say Hi back and wander into the bar... Great its going to be a long night!

In the bar I come face to face with the same barman from my previous 2 dates, he welcomes me with a "setting up another tab tonight are you?" I cringe slightly.. Chookter looks over at me and says "oh they seem to know you quite well in here then" eh yeah!. Set up my tab, settle down not with a coffee but with a large red and drink it almost in the one go! Incidentally he still doesn't look any better and what the hell is he saying, I just can't make it out? I smile sweetly and nod in where I think are all the right places... Hell I then realise he could be saying to me "how's about it?" and I would be agreeing so I stop doing that..

The hour drags by, seriously! I learn also in that hour that he has booked himself into a hotel in Edin for the night - presumptious or what?? there is no way I am hugging this man let alone going back to his hotel room!

"Blah blah blah blah eat?" I am assuming he means do I want something to eat? I say yes (what the f? why? I don't know - dont ask! - Im thinking it must be a) because I am in the Livingroom and b) it saves me cooking! So I agree.... I make a mental note there and then to google self help when I get home - I think I need it!

I eat, I drink, and I get the hell out of there! It's another no no. 4 Dates down and not one option of someone I would share a drink with on a second occassion!

As I am leaving he goes to the toilet. Barman shouts me over and says "eh I take it the dates not going too well then?" I said "what do you mean" he was like "come on you have been in here 4 times in the last couple of weeks and I have never seen you with the same man twice!" oops - time for a new venue I feel!!!

Get in taxi, say goodbye - air kiss this time..

2 mins in the text comes! - "Hey just to say had a lovely night, really hope we can do it again, you're fab"

Note to all guys out there - LISTEN WE LIKE THE CHALLENGE! MAKING IT TOO EASY FOR US IS A TURN OFF! DON'T TRY SO BLOODY HARD NEXT TIME!!!!

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